If you are in anything remotely like a fight, accusation, or recrimination, do not under any circumstances get emotional. Sociopaths see ultimatums, artificial pressure (e.g. Your child is half her, so will probably grow up disrespecting you too, if you can't hold your own against your partner.
Sociopaths generally don't want to hear about how what you feel if what you feel is negative towards them. Don't worry about her hurting your child, she will probably want to alienate him/her from you more than she will want to have him/her trauma bond to you by her inflicting trauma on him.
It can be terribly useful to take a step back from one’s own preoccupations and map them against the problems of the world in order to maintain perspective and correct for selfishness and myopia, but “be grateful the problem you have isn’t a different problem” isn’t a sufficient holistic answer either.
(For what it’s worth, masturbation and sex are not the same thing; the fact that your girlfriend sometimes masturbates with a vibrator is not necessarily a referendum on how she feels about having sex with you.
We have had sex several times, but once we were in bed and I suggested we use it and she said it had dead batteries.
Should it upset or worry me that she is clearly using it on her own time? We are always together—it’s not as if I’m away on trips and she is lonely—so why wouldn’t she just initiate sex with me rather than using the vibrator?
I’m sure the grievers don’t notice or care either way, but should I continue to fake pray?
A: You can kneel in front of a casket and briefly acknowledge the sadness of someone’s death or think about your grieving friend’s needs—you are not “fake praying,” you are having a genuine moment of reflection.