A whole new and enchanting world opens up to teens as sexuality and romance loom large during the adolescent years.Biological and social drives catapult teens into new sensations and experiences and they can spend a lot of time learning how to deal with the resulting emotions.Often parents address worst case scenarios, such as pregnancy or disease, but leave out the more important task of mentoring their teens on the broader issues of sexuality and laying a foundation of healthy sexual values.Young girls are more regretful about their sexual experiences and more likely to shoulder negative consequences.Teens need a reality check so that they understand that what they see in the media is not what is really going on among typical, real-life ordinary people.Actually, the truth is they are already thinking about it.Most school curricula is not comprehensive enough, and does not touch on the values piece that is so important in helping teens put the facts into a context with which you will be comfortable.
You can start this aspect of your parenting journey by accepting that sexual awakening and desire is a normal and healthy part of young adolescent development, and includes curiosity and experimentation as they learn about their sexual selves.
Sexual experimentation is part and parcel of growing up; almost all adolescents engage in some sort of sexual behavior so parents who think, “not my daughter, not my son,” are not facing the realities of their adolescent’s experience and developmental tasks.
Parents can bring up a dialogue by using “I” Messages: “I am concerned, and want to make sure you have the information you need to make good decisions.” Rather than be discouraged, parents need to exert even more effort to guide their children so that their teens can get sexuality into realistic perspective.
However, for many parents, sexuality is one of the most uncomfortable subjects they face during child-rearing.
Despite this hesitancy, parents need to rise to the occasion, because their teens desperately need information and guidance.